How to improve your communication
The “I” in Communication
What’s the first thing that comes to your mind when you read this title?
If you thought of the ‘me’ in communication, I’d have done the same too — until a discussion with fellow counsellors changed my perspective. That’s when I realized this insight was worth sharing.
A manager I was coaching once said, “I ended a meeting with a remark that felt rude in hindsight.” In another instance, he told a colleague, “You always want to have the last word.” A year and a half later, it still bothered him.
I’ve heard many such stories. People say something that leaves others hurt or angry — and then wonder what went wrong.
The missing piece is often Intent — the real “I” in communication.
When we begin to communicate, our intent stays in our head. The purpose of communication is to ensure that intent is received the same way by the listener. But what we mean, say, and what the other person understands are often three different things.
The listener observes tone, words, and body language — and attaches a meaning based on their own filters and experiences.
That’s how miscommunication happens.
So how do we bridge this gap?
If you are the one communicating:
- Be clear about your intent — what do you really want the other person to understand or feel?
- Understand the context — who you’re speaking to, and what emotions are in play.
- Form your statements mindfully. Say them out loud or write them down — does it sound like what you meant?
- Keep the language simple and direct. Avoid jargon.
- Ensure your thoughts and actions are congruent — alignment builds trust.
If you’re the listener:
- Pay attention to both words and body language.
- Ask questions to clarify rather than assume.
- Paraphrase what you understood — not word for word, but in your own way.
- Be mindful of the context — emotions often shape meaning more than words.
When communication is anchored in clarity of intent, awareness of context, and emotional balance — understanding flows naturally. That’s where harmony begins, in both personal and professional spaces.
From Enabling Ventures
At Enabling Ventures, we believe communication begins with awareness — noticing your thoughts, intentions, and patterns, and tuning into how others receive them. When you apply this awareness consistently, your ability to communicate effectively becomes a skill that grows naturally. Small, mindful shifts in how you think, speak, and respond create lasting harmony and impact, both personally and professionally.